Aelissm Davis figured she would eventually return home to Northstar, Montana, but not like this—driven to seek the tranquility of the secluded valley by memories of her dead boyfriend and the advances of an obsessive former friend. Just when she begins to relax, a call from her old friend makes it clear he wasn’t deterred, and she calls her overprotective uncle for advice. Things become even more tangled when he sends Patrick O’Neil “on vacation” to keep an eye on her. Aelissm is pretty sure her uncle is playing matchmaker again, but despite her annoyance, she finds herself irresistibly drawn to Pat. He is a haunted man with a kind smile and sad eyes, and he may just be the best thing to ever happen to her… if she can convince him to stay.
My 7th grade English teacher, Mrs. Horn gave us an open-ended assignment at the end of the school year. She told us to write a three-page story about what we would like to do most over the summer. It had to be Fiction…you know like fly to moon, play centerfield for the Cardinals…that type of stuff. Well…being the little devil I WAS back then, and having a crush on Mrs. Horn, the Blond Bomb, I wrote three pages of porn detailing her and I making love on a beach on some far off planet. It was not very graphic compared to many forms of porn…I call it porn because I used the word F** a lot and screw, and I stuck it to her and crap like that. I described it the best I could because back then in seventh grade I was still a virgin. I did not know what it was like to make love but I sure read enough of my big brothers porn stash to use the words properly…I think so anyway.
I turned it in unceremoniously and sat down at my desk.
Over the weekend, she read my little porn script, with her and I as the stars. That Monday at the start of her class, she called me out to the hall and escorted me to see Mr. Swan, our disciplinarian principle. I sat outside his door listening to the muffled voices behind the oak obstruction. I was surprised to hear him laughing. The laughing became louder as Mrs. Horn joined in…then the secretary ran in and she began laughing. This went on for a while.
I was looking around and saw my mother enter the outer office where I sat. She was not happy. The secretary asked her to step into Mr. Swan’s office, and she did. A few minutes later I heard her laughing, then again they were all laughing. She stepped out of the office wiping away tears of laughter and holding the story I wrote…She was trying to look very motherly behind her smirks and failed attempts of controlling her laughter.
Mr. Swan stood next to her, and smiled. He asked me to step into his office. I stood in front of his desk like a prisoner ready for exile to the island of Crete. He commended me on my paper, and said it was well written except for a few minor spelling errors, and word usages (I would grow accustom to hearing those critiques). He went on to say that the paper broke some sort of school rule…blah, blah, blah. He gave me a choice of swats or suspension…I choose the swats, five of them with a paddle the size of Texas. My mother watched him deliver the punishment, one hard swat after the other.
Ordered back to class, I left the office with tear-filled eyes.
That night I was lying on our living room floor watching Batman or something similar, I heard my dad laughing. I turned around to see him reading the paper I wrote. He looked at me and said, “Horrible…you shouldn’t write things like this son,” he turned away and started laughing again. I never found out what was so funny…My mother tore the story in pieces, tossed it in the trash and dumped greasy leftovers over it.
That summer, I saw Mrs. Horn and her husband at a local park. I said hello and she introduced me to her husband as the boy who, “wrote that story.” He looked at me, and as if recalling the story and that funny, whatever it was, he began to laugh. I walked away humiliated.
Today is the last day you can get both of the books under my Geekus Maximus pen name for free. Download your free copies:
Horror Stories From A Computer Tech
Seven true stories about the craziest, creepiest, and funniest customers I’ve ever met as an in-home computer technician. Read them at your own risk…
Geek of Legend: The Elvish Screwdriver [Kindle Edition]
Robert had just been let go from his supervisor role at a tech firm. After his interview at Geek Tech, Inc., he agrees to a one-time test run to see if he’ll like the job, since the entire situation seems a bit shady and his predecessor was killed on the job. Come along for the journey as he fixes computers and technology in a world of goblins, dwarves, elves, trolls, orcs, and talking horses.
And behold, there was a great earthquake, for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven and came and rolled back the stone and sat on it. 3 His appearance was like lightning, and his clothing white as snow. 4 And for fear of him the guards trembled and became like dead men. 5 But the angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. 6 He is not here, for he has risen, as he said.
A Book For Kids About Pandas: The Giant Panda Bear [Kindle Edition]
This book about the Giant Panda was written for children from 5 to 12 years of age. Due to the detailed nature of animal life, it is appropriate to be read by an adult to younger children.
The Giant Panda is a fascinating creature that has captured the world’s heart as it struggles near the brink of extinction. Learn about its unique habitat and find out answers to the following questions:
Where are pandas normally found in the wild?
How do the panda’s eyes differ from other bears?
What types of food does the panda eat? Does the panda eat any meat?
How nutritious is the food that pandas eat?
How many cubs can a mother panda raise at a time?
Does the father panda help with raising the cub?
Are pandas territorial?
How many cubs can a mother panda have in her lifetime? How often can she give birth?
How does the panda eat?
Why are pandas shaped the way they are? Why are panda heads round?
What does the panda spend most of its time doing?
What do baby pandas look like when they are first born?
How big do pandas get?
How heavy do pandas weigh?
How long do panda live in the wild and in captivity?
Does the Giant Panda belong in the bear family or the raccoon family?
Why is the panda on the endangered species list?
How is mankind helping to increase the panda’s numbers?
How does the birth rate affect the number of pandas?
Find out the answers to the above questions and much more. This book contains over 40 amazing and descriptive pictures of the beautiful Giant Panda.
Buy the book today and let us know how you liked it by leaving a review.
A Galaxy To Conquer: (The Human Chronicles Saga Part 2,Book 3) [Kindle Edition]
In A Galaxy to Conquer, all the great forces in the galaxy clash for one final, epic battle to determine who will come out on top. And racing the clock is Adam Cain and his team of aliens and SEALs out to rescue Riyad Tarazi from a Kracori prison ahead of the approaching conflagration. The Kracori homeworld of Elision is about to be destroyed, and if Adam and his team can’t get Riyad out in time all will be lost.
For this one final mission, Adam has recruited many of his old friends from past adventures, including the aliens Kaylor and Jym, along with his old SEAL Team Six teammates Master Chief Geoffrey Rutledge, Petty Officer First Class John Tindal and Admiral Andy Tobias. And of course, the feisty and always interesting Sherri Valentine is along as well, bringing with her a unique down-home Kentucky brashness that readers in the past have found ‘humanizing’ to the Saga.
Within the pages of A Galaxy to Conquer you will learn the fate of all these characters and more, plus a resolution to the geopolitical struggles plaguing the galaxy. You will also learn what becomes of Adam Cain. (Let’s just say this old soldier doesn’t just fade away. Instead he heads out for new adventures in a galaxy far, far away.)
Don’t miss this exciting, final volume of The Human Chronicles Saga — one of the bestselling sci-fi series on Amazon for the past two years. Once again, the hard-headed aliens of the galaxy have to be taught a lesson, one they repeatedly seem to forget: Don’t Mess With The Humans!